A lightbulb funny

[biziedizie]

How many members does it take to change a lightbulb???


1 to change the light bulb and 1 to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
53 to flame the spell checkers
41 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb"
... another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
156 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in violation of their "acceptable use policy"
109 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb forum about changing light bulbs be stopped
111 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy> the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three"
4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ
44 to ask what is a "FAQ"
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
143 to say "do a search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 new forum member to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again
 :D :D :D :D :D

[Jeff]

That sounds like any other forum but this one. Its sure funny, but most all of it sure don't apply to our members and the Forestry Forum.

[biziedizie]

  I agree with you 100% Jeff, and I hope that none of our fine upstanding members here think that I was thinking of us guys when I posted this.
  Just thought it was funny :D :D :D

[DouginUtah]

Here is one that is making the rounds. Y'all decide if it is *more appropriate* for the forum members.  :D  ;D

CONSIDERATE SPOUSE

It is important for men to remember that as women grow older it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping they did when they were younger. When men notice this, they should try not to become upset and yell.
Expressing patience is clearly the superior option. Let me relate how I handle the situation.
When I chucked my job and took early retirement a year ago, it became necessary for my wife Nancy to get a full-time job both for extra income and for health insurance benefits that we need.
She was a trained lab tech when we met thirty some years ago and was fortunate to land a job at the local medical center. It was shortly after she started working at this job that I noticed that she was beginning to show her age.
I usually get home from fishing or hunting about the same time she gets home from work. And although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says that she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts supper. I try not to yell at her when this happens. Instead, I tell her to take her time. You see, I understand that she is not as young as she used to be. I just tell her to wake me when she finally does get supper on the table.
She used to wash and dry the dishes just as soon as we finished eating. It is now not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after supper. I do what I can by reminding her several times each evening that the dishes aren't cleaning themselves. I know she appreciates this, as it does seem to help her get them done before she goes to bed.
Our washer and dryer are in the basement. When she was younger, Nancy used to be able to go up and down the stairs all day and not get tired. Now that she is older she seems to get tired so much more quickly. Sometimes she says she just can't make another trip down those steps. I don't make a big issue of this. As long as she finishes up the laundry by the next evening I am willing to overlook it.
Not only that, but unless I really need something ironed to wear to the Monday's lodge meeting or to Wednesday's or Saturday's poker night club or to Tuesday's or Thursday's bowling or something like that, I will tell her to wait until the next evening to do the ironing. This gives her a little more time to do some of those odds and ends things like shampooing the dog, vacuuming, or dusting.
Also, if I have had a really good day fishing, this allows her to gut and scale the fish at a more leisurely pace. Nancy is starting to complain a little occasionally. Not often, mind you, but just enough for me to notice.
For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. In spite of her complaining, I continue to try to offer her positive encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any, if you know what I mean. When doing simple jobs she seems to think she needs more rest periods than she used to have to take. A couple of weeks ago she said she had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I overlook comments like these because I realize it's just age talking. In fact, I try to not embarrass her when she needs these little extra rest breaks. I tell her to f ix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. I tell her that as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me and take her break by the hammock so she can talk with me until I fall asleep.
I could go on and on, but I think you know where I'm coming from. I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Nancy on a daily basis. I'm not saying that the ability to show this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it nearly impossible.
No one knows better than I do how frustrating women can become as they get older. My purpose in writing this is simply to suggest that you make the effort. I realize that achieving the exemplary level of showing consideration I have attained is out of reach for the average man. However guys, even if you just yell at your wife a little less often because of this article, I will consider that writing it was worthwhile.

Note: This article was found next to the author's body. The cause of death is still under investigation.  :D :D :D

[EZ]

Holy smokes, Bizie, you must have alot of time on your hands right now. Funny stuff, tho. I always wonder how guys come up with so much stuff. ;D
EZ

[biziedizie]

  EZ for once in what seems like forever I had a chance to visit a site that has some funny stuff on it. 8) 8) 8)
  We just finished a huge warehouse/office job and I get the rest of the day off to do nothing but work on my camper and drink beer. 8) 8) 8)
  Am I gonna be hurting in the am??? Might be but at the moment I don't really care. :D :D :D

   DouginUtah Me thinks maybe.....just maybe that's why my last wife left me. :D :D :D

  Do ya think I should have got her an electric start mower??? ;D ;D


     Steve

[dail_h]

   Hey Biz,
   What happened to posts about food in the original post? We always get off topic on food ;D ;D ;D

[Minnesota_boy]

I have a light bulb burned out (or should I have spelled it lightbulb or maybe it's a lamp).  It looks to be a 60 watt incandescendant.  Should I replace it with another 60 watt or maybe go on up to 100 so I can see my food better?   How about the little flourescent bulbs?  Should I stand on a chair or find a step ladder?   ;D

[biziedizie]

  dail_h I wasn't hungry. ;D I am now though 8) Must take some food back to the camper to cook. 8) Need more beers to as the fridge is running low. ;D

   Minnesota_boy Use a candle......less power. 8)

    Steve
  

[C_Miller]

litebulbs? food? that reminds me I still have that camera in the fridge.  never did figure out how the fridge lite worked but I found out who's been takin' my beer.
C

[lumberlady]

just thought you might want the view of the female side..

its nice to work all day and come home to do those house chores just for our men. we want our man to look his best so we spend more time on his clothes than we do our own. and we really love cooking those 3 hr meals and doing those dishes all by hand.    NOT.....

only in tv land :D :D :D
its a nice thought though huh guys?