Ever Notice...

[DanG]

I've been looked down upon before, and it isn't pleasant, but I always just let it go.  I take solace in the knowledge that a surly fast food clerk probably won't be there long.  But most of the time, I find that their attitude is a direct reflection of the attitude of the customer.  If they sense that the customer is looking down on them, whether he really is or not, they will set their cap to show that they are his equal.  It is just a human nature thing.  Since I retired, I'm not in much of a hurry about anything, and I really miss the frequent interactions I had with people when I was working.  So, when I approach a clerk or cashier, I always act like I'm glad to see them, because I am.  I have found that I almost always get excellent service when they get the feeling that we are equals, which we are.  I try to make them feel that we are two business people making a transaction, which we are, rather than trying to make them feel like they are my servant.  I promise you, if you smile and say hi before you start rattling off your order, you'll get better service 99% of the time.  I also promise that 1% of the time, you'll get a surly clerk that you'll want to mop up the parking lot with.  He probably won't be there next time you come in, though. ;)

[logwalker]

I think DanG has it right. I always try to put my best foot forward when I approach a place of business.

Just today I was in a Ford Dealership for the first time trying to get a transmission problem diagnosed. I had already done several things myself to the 1994 Ford truck and had a good handle on the problem but needed a second opinion. I asked the service manager, a nice young man of about 35, what he could do to help me. He said they could hook it up and diagnose it and it would cost $90. I told him to go ahead and signed a work order.

So out comes this big guy, Bill, who was a little too large for the clothes he was wearing and asks me for the keys. As I give them to him I begin to tell him all the symptoms and the things I had done to eliminate the hard shifting problem. He patiently listened as he hooked up his test equipment and I could tell he wasn't putting a lot of stock into what I was saying. But he didn't make it obvious that he felt that way and wasn't the least bit rude.

Well, I got to the end of my list and made the quiet announcement that in my opinion it was the electronic speedo head that was causing the problem. He politely dismissed it and gave me three or four other things that would be more likely. I expected that reaction and thought to myself, "Well, let's let the system work and see what he comes up with".

He reads the codes form the computer and I anxiously asked what he had found. After he told me I chuckled aloud and asked him if it was a real pain the the rear to get a customer like me who asked too many questions and thought he knew a little to much? Once again he politely declined and tactfully stated "these problems can be very difficult to figure out". He then said he would need to test drive the truck and took off and was gone for at least 30 minutes.

I amused myself by finding Chad, the young service manager again and playing 20 Questions about the later model Ford diesels and his experience with each one. Again they were met with thoughtful and patient answers and I was never made to feel like I was interfering in his job or taking his valuable time away from him. About this time I began to thinking what a good experience I was having and even if it was costing me some money it just might be worth it.

So finally Bill the mechanic returns and takes my truck around back and puts it in his bay. Chad had left his desk so I asked the assistant manager if I could go back and find out about the test ride and he says he was sorry but that was not possible for the usual reasons. He said that they could call him up to the front if I wanted but I said no, that wasn't necessary. 

I turned around and Bill was at Chad's desk with the paperwork. We talked and he told me about the test ride and how the symptoms were not there at first and he had to drive a long time to get them to appear. He then told me how he had pulled the codes again at his bay and then did some research to try and get to the root cause. By then Chad was back and listening to Bill finish with his delivery. The bottom line was it was either the speedo head or the wiring going from it to the computer. He asked me if I would like him to go any further and I said no, that I would take it from there. I thanked him and he asked me if I would like to have the truck washed before he returned it and at first I said no but then reconsidered and said sure, if they had time, why not?

Then Bill and Chad talked for a moment and Bill left for the back to get the truck washed and brought out. Chad asked me to follow him to the cashier and when we got there he said to sign the paperwork and that was it. I had my credit card out but he said no, it was on them today. For the first time since arriving there I really didn't know what to say. But I did express my appreciation and that as long as I had a Ford I would consider them as my dealer.

I then shook Chad's hand and went an climbed into my now shiny red Ford pick-up. And come to think of it, I was dressed in work clothes that were less than clean and had my Georgia logging slippers on. How's that for an attitude? Just when you think you have your little world figured out they throw a curve at you.   

Actually I just wanted to write a longer post than Tom's.  ;) ;) Joe

[DanG]

I always try to put my best foot forward when I approach a place of business.

and had my Georgia logging slippers on.

And there's the key!  If you had been dressed like a Philadelphia Lawyer and didn't have a scratch in the bed of your 4wd Powerstroke Dually, they would have soaked you for every penny they could get.  You would have been out of place on their turf.  As it was, they saw you as a peer, and respected you for it.

[york]

Hi guys,
this is interesting-first of all,i will not eat at fast food dumps-have a young friend "Ryan" who just out of school,got a job at Burger King-he said,what ever you do,do not eat at our Burger King,they do crap to your food...

Was watching "speeders" last nite-cop pulled over a kid speeding,coming home from his work at some fast food place-cop walked back to his car,kid looks at camera and said "we lick your food"...

These kids that work at fast food,they hate you-they say we are rude and look down on them...not sure,cause i don`t go there...

Now,the kid at the top,bet he had no role model in his life-also he was never in the service....Bert

[Tom]

Actually I just wanted to write a longer post than Tom's.

:D :D   I'm not alone.    (Doo dee doo dee doo dee  simulation of The Outer Limits music)   

[Warbird]

Hey Joe.  Thanks for sharing the story.  The guys at the Ford dealership here just loooooove to see my old rig come driving into the lot.  They are always extremely professional and never look down on me; however, the they are *much* more expensive than other shops around town.  Here is one of the only pics I have uploaded right now of the old girl:



She's a work truck, through and through, and looks the part.  In other words, she's pretty dented up and looks scary with the snow plow hanging off the front but it always demands respect.  ;)

As for the original topic...  DanG is right except I think his number of 1% of the time getting someone surly is too low.  Seems to me that the more 'advanced' we get as a society, the more of a problem this whole thing becomes.  Folks like to feel superior and sophisticated.  My experience has been that no matter how nice and smiley I am, if I'm dressed in my chainsawing gear and go to the store for lunch or whatever right after having been out cutting, I am 'looked down on' at least once.  For some reason, it is especially bad if I have a full load of firewood loaded up in the truck and trailer pictured above.

Ironically, this problem used to exist with some friends of mine a few years ago.  We got screwed when we bought this house and it needed a *lot* of work.  Well, back before fuel prices went through the roof, I bought a nice wood stove and started gathering my own firewood.  Some of the friends in that group are pretty well off and frowned at me and chuckled, thinking I was wasting time, effort, and money.  They didn't intend it to be hurtful but basically, they were doing exactly what the original poster stated.  Let me tell you what, though...  they aren't chuckling anymore.  ;)

Guess it all boils down to, 'people are just people'.  This sort of thing is bound to happen.  I think that we have a great opportunity to decide how we are going to react when it happens.  See, if we are gracious and don't let it ruin our day, then there is a good chance we might positively impact the person who was looking down on us.  Or not.  *shrug*  People are just people.  And we all breath the same air.

Guess I should stop typing now, lest I make a post longer than Joe's or Tom's.  :D 

[ErikC]

  I try and be friendly as mentioned by a few other posts and it usually goes a long way. But there are always those people you won't have good luck with no matter what you do. You can't do much to stop it. When I first read this post I immediately thought of that scene from the movie lonesome dove in the saloon.
http://www.youtube.com/v/pVBjBClBSao&hl=en&fs=1

[timber tramp]

  My goodness, never expected so much response. Glad for all the input, advice, annecdotes, and a few funny stories.

[treecyclers]

I find it amusing when people judge me based solely on my appearance.
I buy my honey stuff from time to time, and usually know what I am looking for when I walk in to any given store.
My favorites are when I walk in to high ticket item shops. I'll usually dress like a slobby doggy, with a dirty ball cap on my noggin, and flip flops, just to see their reactions.
The best was when I was in a Dillards, buying her some new jammies she wanted.
There were 4 sales ladies on the floor, two younger and two older.
The older ladies wouldn't have anything to do with me, as did one of the younger ladies, making the false assumption that I would be counting pennies to pay for whatever I bought.
The young lady that assisted me ended up with a big sale, and since I knew that they have sales quotas they must meet each week, I made sure to help her out as much as I could.
I got some great deals, since the sales girl pointed out a number of sale racks that had really good stuff on them, and I bought twice what I had originally planned on, and paid cash. Seeing the looks on the other ladies faces as I pulled out a fistful of $100 bills was priceless.

[Cedarman]

I have a little fun when people of all kinds come in and a lot will ask if I will sell to anybody.  I say, "Only those that have money"  We laugh and they usually say, "We've got that".  The old geezers that bring their buddy along for the ride are the best.  They'll drive 100 miles to pick up a couple hundred feet that could be shipped cheaper than they could drive, but they want to take a trip.  My goal is to get all the money they want to spend and a lot of times they leave with empty wallets or keep just enough for dinner.  Being nice to people always gets better sales and they leave happier.

[VTLogSlayer]

Reading stories like these just made my 3 days of final exams coming up so much better!  ;D  :P  I too love going into a nice store like that with my carhartts and big ol' boots on.;D :D  Never expecting me to buy much or be able to afford things that expensive.  I work hard every day in the summer and whenever i can while away during the school year to have a little cash available.  Store clerks never "run" over to help a kid like me, like they do for adults.  They are suprised when a stack of bills come out of my pocket at the register ;D ;D ;)  And i look over and give them a nice polite smile ;D

[sawman]

  I recall a story told several years ago about three brothers, who lived way back out in the hills, who farmed and had a sawmill. They went together to buy them a new 2 ton truck.
Got to the dealer and found what they were looking for, and told the saleman that they wanted the truck. He asked them how they were going to finance it, through a bank or the dealership.
They each started digging in their pockets and asked if cash would work.
They paid for the truck right there on the spot, much to the salesmans surprise.

[Faron]

This was told as a true story.  In the WWII years, tires and many other war essentials were rationed on the home front.  One farmer was hauling hogs to market.  He had a tire fail, and needed another.  After getting his hogs to market, he stopped at the local rationing office.  As you might guess, he smelled pretty rank.  After a few minutes of wrinkling her nose, the smartly dressed woman running the place had enough.  "Don't you ever take a bath?" she asked. " Once in a while," replied the farmer . "Do you?" " Every day!" snapped the lady.  "Well, I'm glad to hear that." said the farmer. " Because I figure I will have to kiss your "backside" to get that tire!"

[WH_Conley]

The old man I bought this place from went to the tractor dealership and wanted to buy a tractor. They talked about price and the difference in cash, I know the dealer, he stuck his foot in outh this time. Anyway, the old man started pulling cash out of a pocket to count the cash price. The dealer said,"I think that pocket a little short", thee old man said, "Eeeh. I got three more pockets" He got his tractor.

[LeeB]

Try working in the oilfield and see how people treat you. I just tell them I'm a piano player in a cat house now days. :D I know what you mean about beig treated differently by what you wear and how you look after a days work. I dress and act like a hayseed all the time anyway. I really don't care what they think, especially the little twerp behind the fast food counter. If he's so smart, how come I make more in a week than he does all year?

[AJinNZ]

In school we all had to have a sit down with a 'careers advisor'.
I was asked what I wanted to do and said helicopter pilot.

Got politely told i wasnt smart enough for that and maybe a trade would be better.

I got qualified in a trade..........and then went and got a degree. So much for not being too smart.

Just ended a job where the customer was an accountant. His Phd didnt help any with his day to day common sense.
I have to bite my tongue some days cos I want to ask them if they are so superior, then how come they dont do the work on their own house??


Sometimes I am tempted to tell them I have 'higher education', but then having to explain why I am not using it is something I dont want to get into.
One of the cleverest, most ingenious people I ever met had no education to speak of and was dyslexic as well.

[crtreedude]

Well, since my habit is to throw on anything that isn't totally destroyed, I do get the looks. I love it, absolutely love it, when people underestimate me. It costs me nothing, but I tell you, it might cost them a lot.  ;D

When someone thinks I don't know business, well, it just makes me very, very happy.

I have never really cared much for what others thought about me anyway. More their problem than mine. I get nervous if everyone thinks I am great - because that probably means I am being two faced, (at least) since you can't please everyone.

But, if you work for me and are rude to anyone, you are out the door.

I used to interview people for consulting in software. I would always show up to do the interviews dressed like a janitor (or worse) and greet the people waiting to be interviewed like I was a janitor just showing up to clean the floor. Once I even grabbed a broom.  :D

Boy was it a rude surprise if they were disrespectful when they walked into my office...  >:(

[Norm]

I can remember years ago I was installing an ultrasound system at a small rural hospital in NE Iowa. I'm uncrating it down in the receiving dock when a gentleman shows up in the uniforms that janitors wear and asks if I need a hand. Grateful for the help and someone to talk to I said sure thing. We get to talking and I can tell he's been in the hard stuff but it's Christmas eve day and he and I are probably to only ones working that day. Not my business and he's not inebriated real bad so we go about getting it out of the crate. He helps me move it up to the radiology department, I start it up and am showing him how it works while I run the test diagnostics. Everything checks out right and finally the tech shows up and notices my helper with me. She asks what Dr is doing still working after the Christmas party (these were the days that liquor at parties was still accepted.) He tells her he was bored and thought he'd help out with the install. Later I learned he was the radiologist for three hospitals and made really good money. I always enjoyed my trips up there to work and Dr was never anything but just one of us.

After 25 years of having to wear a suit when I retired from corporate I vowed to never wear that hangmans noose again. Usually I am unshaven and dressed like I just came out of the fields. Don't care what others think of that but I do judge folks that judge me by my looks.

[Cedarman]

Just this morning had an e-mail from a person whose first name is Tchinga.  But the subject was  Request for Quote.   Which I see quite often from people needing lumber.  Thought I'd better check it out just in case.  Sure enough, a legitimate request from someone with a foreign name from South Bend, In. 

I prejudged what I thought the e-mail would be, but never wanting to lose a sale checked it out just in case.  Glad I didn't hit the delete button on that one.

[Tim L]

In the 70's I worked at a gas station/truck stop . This trucking company used to have an account with us for the tucks as well as company office staff . One guy drove an old Jeep Wagoneer his name was Bill and I thought he was the maint guy. On a slow summer Saturday one day Bill pulled in and my co-worker and I offered him a cool refreshing beverage.(common in those days) . So we're sittin in lawn chairs shootin the bull when the general manager of the trucking company pulls in ."Oh **** I said I hope I didn't get you in trouble Bill I know this guy is a real (you know) ". "How so?" says Bill ,and I tell him how rude and nasty this guy is to us . Bill told us it won't happen again and proceeds to meet this guy at the pump and rip him a new one ! As it turns out, Bill owns the company . The general manager was very friendly after his chat with Bill and we never had any more trouble with him .

[Dave Shepard]

In school we all had to have a sit down with a 'careers advisor'.
I was asked what I wanted to do and said helicopter pilot.

Got politely told i wasnt smart enough for that and maybe a trade would be better.

I got qualified in a trade..........and then went and got a degree. So much for not being too smart.

Just ended a job where the customer was an accountant. His Phd didnt help any with his day to day common sense.
I have to bite my tongue some days cos I want to ask them if they are so superior, then how come they dont do the work on their own house??


Sometimes I am tempted to tell them I have 'higher education', but then having to explain why I am not using it is something I dont want to get into.
One of the cleverest, most ingenious people I ever met had no education to speak of and was dyslexic as well.

I had a coworker that went to the same high school as I did. He is about 25 years older than I am. He had a similar situation with his guidance councilor, a bit like your career adviser. She said don't bother going to college, it won't do you any good. He didn't go, not that he wasn't smart enough. Turns out it was my grandmother that told him that. :D

I have a friend much like you mentioned. Absolutely brilliant, and dyslexic as well. Has taught himself more than most will ever know. I always wanted to know if we ever wonders if there really is a dog.

[Dodgy Loner]

Right out of college,  I got a job with the Univ. of Mo Extension Division.  In a couple of years,  I was an area specialist.  I often wore a suit and tie and was well respected in the community.  Myself,  I knew that I didn't earn my pay and did little good for the community. 

The extension service must be a lot different in Missouri than in Georgia if you felt that you didn't earn your pay and did little good for the community :D. I'm certainly more satisfied with the help that I provide to people than I am in my paycheck ;).

[cheyenne]

All my life  i was in business for myself & 95% of the people that worked for me had degrees. But I never held it against them that I never finished the 9th grade & was smart enough to sign a paycheck. If you ever want to have fun! buy a piece of property, go to the closing & put cash on the table. Then watch them go in circles because they don't know how to handle a cash sale....Cheyenne

[DanG]

The extension service must be a lot different in Missouri than in Georgia if you felt that you didn't earn your pay and did little good for the community :D. I'm certainly more satisfied with the help that I provide to people than I am in my paycheck ;).

Dodgy, things may have been a little different back in the early part of the previous century. ;D

[Howdy]

What a fun thread.
Stories from salt of the earth folks and lessons for us all.

My story is when helping a friend shop for a new truck and we went to the dealerships by way of my old '73 ford F100.  One look at what we drove up in and most salesmen found something else to do.  The one that helped us got the sale and my friend drove away with a good deal that night after paying cash.  The look on the other sales staff face was delightful to see. 

Moral of the story is never to prejudge as it will usually bite you in the rear.
Howdy