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Health Q&A

Started by Mark M, June 30, 2003, 12:33:35 PM

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Mark M

I thought I would pass this good advice along to everyone since it clears up some popular misconceptions.

Mark



> > > HEALTH Q & A:
> > >
> > > Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this
> > > true?
> > > A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't
> > > waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up
> > > your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can
> > > extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer?
> > > Take a nap.
> > >
> > > Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
> > > A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat?
> > > Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing
> > > more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your
> > > system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field
> > > grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of
> > > your recommended daily allowance of vegetable slop.
> > >
> > > Q: Is beer or wine bad for me?
> > > A: Look, it goes to the earlier point about fruits and vegetables.
> > > As we all know, scientists divide everything in the world into three
> > > categories: animal; mineral; and vegetable. We all know that beer
> > > and wine are not animal, and they are not on the periodic table of
> > > elements, so that only leaves one thing, right?  My advice: Have a
> > > burger and a beer and enjoy your liquid vegetables.
> > >
> > > Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
> > > A: Well, if you have a body, and you have body fat, your ratio is 1-1.
> > > If you have two bodies, your ratio is 2-1, etc.
> > >
> > > Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular
> > > exercise program?
> > > A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain =
> > > Good.
> > >
> > > Q: If I stop smoking, will I live longer?
> > > A: Nope. Smoking is a sign of individual statement and peace of mind.
> > > If you stop, you'll probably stress yourself to death in record time.
> > >
> > > Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
> > > A: You're not listening. Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil.
> > > In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables
> > > be bad for you?
> > >
> > > Q: What's the secret to healthy eating?
> > > A: Thicker gravy.
> > >
> > > Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the
> > > middle?
> > > A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You
> > > should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
> > >
> > > Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
> > > A: Are you crazy? Cocoa beans... Another vegetable. It's the best,
> > > feel-good food around!
> > >
> > > I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about
> > > food and diets.
> > >
> > > Have a cookie... flour is a veggie!
> > >
> > > "When life hands you lemons, ask for a bottle of tequila and salt."

Furby

 :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Wade

words to live by :D :D :D
If it's worth cutting down a tree for, it's worth doing right

OneWithWood

Of course it is essential to retain the dexterity of the digits through regularly exercising them

One With Wood
LT40HDG25, Woodmizer DH4000 Kiln

Bro. Noble

Mark,

that reminds me of a neighbor I used to have-------Dr. told him to drink 2 oz of wine per day.   He got several centuries ahead :D
Noble
milking and logging and sawing and milking

Mark M

Every morning I do my exercises: up - down - up - down - 10 times, then the other eye :D

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