90. Mother nature always has the upper hand and she can sense things that are never spoken verbally, I'm pretty sure she can read minds, its gotta be a woman thing, I think she's partly related to my wife.
91. The nicest tree in the whole timber [that you own] thats stood for a hundred years and you have saved as long as you can remember for lumber for a specific project will most likely be struck by lightning a few days before you cut it down and are prepared to saw for lumber for the awaited project, and damage the nicest logs in the whole tree. Refer to #90
92. Any father with several teenage daughters will need a wife and mother to translate and communicate with the daughters for the father will be clueless as to how to go about it on his own and will be more puzzled as to how in a few short years these same daughters will become for a future husband what their mother became for him, smarter, more diplomatic, not easily surpirsed by dumb stunts, knows whats going on at all times, can preditct the future and others upcoming actions and can sense danger, take care of problems daily. And the father will be just speechless as to where this all came from for a few years before he didn't know how to even say hello or good morning without saying the wrong thing or having his wife tell him what to say and when to say it. My wife says its because she needed a "project" of her own to be responsible for.
93. The more men think they know about women the more clueless they really are.
94. Any father awaits the day when their kids no longer keep needing assistance and help with their problems and can figure things out on their own, the phone stops ringing from school because they are in trouble all the time and the father says aloud to their mother, gosh its sure nice they have grown up enough to stay out of trouble and things are running smoothly and thats when she gets to tell him, no, now they are just smarter than you is all, they figured out how to keep you from knowing is all, nothing else has changed. If your not married with kids eveyone should be and have kids, that way you truely find out how dumb you really are, its a humbling experience.
95. Those that can't or haven't, they teach or tell you how to, the less they know the more they claim to.
96. Most parenting books are written by someone with either no kids or one kid
97. Most experts on marriage will have been divorced at least once or you never hear from the spouse, they remain quiet.
98. Money is the root of all evil, no not really, free time is, if your in doubt just go ask any government official if what your doing is ok.
99. You'll spend your life working for somene, even if your self emplyeed, its always the banker, landowner, mill, family, equipment dealer, boss, foreman, board of dirctors, someone will always tell you what you can and can't do, the higher up the ladder you go the more influence others have over you, its just the opposite for kids, the older they get the less influence you have over them, others take your place in importance.
100. Money can't buy happiness but poverty isn't the answer either,
101 Most experts aren't, refer to #95.96.97, they are just trying to make a buck off you and thats all.
102. You should never do business with or listen to anyone who doesn't offer a guarantee, refer to #101, the amount of guarantee will determine how good they are, say for example politicians or government
103. The higher priced something is the more likely it'll be they get more of your money, theres a direct relationship between cost and not necessarily quality but more so the distrubution of your wealth.
104. When choosing between two purchases, most likely you'll chose the worse option and should have bought the other one instead, that one you didn't buy lasted for years and had the highest rating and resale value and gave those that bought it years of dependable service, the one you bought had recalls and will be a discontinued model in a few years resulting in only a few made.
105. If in doubt as to weather you bought the right one or not just ask your spouse after you bought it, if you ask beforehand she'll always decide on the other one so just go get that one instead of trying to prove her wrong, it'll never happen anyhow.
106. Washing macines and clothes dryers are expensive weather you own one or not, until you do own one, then they are higher priced than you ever imagined.
107. Washable crayons might be washable but are not dryable in a clothes dryer, don't let your kids read the box and draw conclusions from advertising, if they do refer to #106, speaking strictly from experience. The power of advertising will go above and beyond what those putting in advertising will ever think can and will happen, plain and simple advertising works and then some.
108. Its not always a good thing to teach younger and younger kids to read, refer to #106,107, if you do at least take the time to read yourself what you put in front of your kids and give the box to the father and ask him what he sees and reads, the kid in him will most likely come out and he'll think what his kids will actually do, again #106,107
109 Its a lot funnier to have your kids go through the same things as you did, with their own children than it was at the time it happened to you, and its not really immoral to help out by giving the grandkids ideas either, remember your parents did the same for you, call it a teaching lesson. The older you get the greater sense of humor you'll have, and nobody died from a garder snake in the house either that a 6 year old boy brought home and let loose, thats just a myth, maybe thats why your wife got smarter and you didn't.
